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Still dressed. Though a lot of my fantasies usually have me still dressed. You, not so much.

what do i have 2 do 2 hear about this?

Ask nicely?

plz arthur darling take pity on me and impart some of ur wisdom?

Yes, be a smart ass. That'll encourage me to share my fantasies.

wat i could do wit that arse shuld b encouragement enuf.

Edited 2011-02-04 01:22 (UTC)

Maybe I should have you tell me. Share back and forth.

[There's a pause and then another text.]

Used to think about the meetings. You stripped down, on your knees and taking full advantage of those lips.

remember phillips? wenever he'd buzz around you id want to push u into that damn alcove and bite that glorious neck of urs. so hed stop bcause u belonged to me.

...

Phillips? Wait, really? No.

Really?

oi. he was a right tosser. a dickhead of the highest order. but yes.

I know that but... He was after me?

IS THAT WHY YOU BROKE HIS NOSE?!

he wasnt being v. polite about u arthur. there is a difference between teasing and being an absolute arsehole who needs their dick removed. which i wuld hav gladly done.

You broke a man's nose because he insulted me? Is that what you're telling me?

he was implying u wer nothing more than a posh tart darling. im not repeating what he said. so i broke his nose for him. as a v. nice permanent reminder.

Oh. I see. Well...

Thank you.

I fired him because I thought he hit on you and you punched him.

god. how can we have been that into each other n not fucking noticed. i punch a guy in the face, u fire him, we're so blind

The truth? I figured you weren't into... posh tarts.

In gentlemen I've never been much into gentlemen like myself and I was once informed I was much too pretty for anything but a night. For gentlemen like yourself.

i wil set that person on fire i swear 2 god. i wil find them n put matchsticks under their fingernails

Shh... Hey. Calm down. That was a long time ago. We got here. All that matters. Go back to better thoughts.

u r gorgeous n charming n the craziest insane clever person i kno n u wil never hear sum1 speak about u like that again, right? bcause if i evr hear it i wil butcher whover tries

[there's a moment and another text]

now u know y i punched him in the face. sry. i just. it's a thing.

This explains a lot of things in our past. Mostly people who will no longer talk to me and... YOU SON OF A BITCH.

[Almost instant back to back for length.]

Is this why that gorgeous man in Monte Carlo stopped talking to me?!

i told him u wer married. sry. ;)

Liar. No you're not. There may be punishment for this.

o rly? because i hav no guilt. his car was hideous. and ud hav got bored with him.

Edited 2011-02-04 02:10 (UTC)

I wasn't looking to keep him! God, what am I going to do with you?

I only broke up one potential romance for you and I just could NOT stand the way he dressed.

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